Tuesday, January 20, 2009

On Critics and Praise for a Change

Is it not interesting that it is often people who are by themselves not perfect that often highlight the fault in others? In life I have come to realize people with deep insecurities often pick on you the most, trying so hard to compensate for their own problems. It is true we all have insecurities, but we handle it in differing ways. But these folks handle it by making people around them feel as bad..something sadistic about this tactic. Three incidents comes to mind in my own particular dealing with friends.I used to have this girlfriend even though so incredibly beautiful struggled with her weight- not that she was near fat in my own eyes. But she hated her size. She was round...coke bottle, apple figure hence the junk can often seem "junky". Know warrai mean? Well, her way of dealing with this insecurity was to taunt me about my rather slim frame. She will tell me everything but to seek medical attention. LOL....well, slim guys are in vogue now that Obama has won...there u go. But seriously, at some point this chic nearly made me start feeling insecure for something that was so - let us see- vain. Anywyaz, I quickly called her to order...often times, i deal with people like this by calling them out on this tactic. Another similar incident was with this chic I dated briefly. This girl made it a point to make fun of my chipped teeth a product of a childhood accident. Irrespective of entreaties, and well known insecurity (that I wear well) on this matter, she won't bat a retreat. But what if I told you the same girl is actually partially blind? Yes, she could see only with one eye. That didn't remove from her beauty then in my eyes- and oh she was gorgeous- but yet she won't stop beating on me. Finally, I had to put a stop to it- by calling her out. People like this are never fun to hang with; insecurity bred abuse is persistent and just plain crazy cos you can escalate the situation by always exploiting their own insecurity which is tit for tat and not good for peaceful coexistence.

In the spirit of change, I am on "insecure people alert". LOL. Well, when you criticize others it may be worthwhile to look at yourself. At least, I hope to henceforth. Speaking of change, how about praise instead of criticism for a change? I had a glowing performance review today at work with my supervisor. I enjoy the job I have been doing for the past six months....it is a dream come true for me sincerely since project management was the very reason I studied engineering even though no entry position generally exists for such: you get promoted into it and I was last year. I am grateful to God for the success so far, while I keep working at it. But I am having fun. Are you?


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